[She'll have to find him somewhere on the ship because he's in hiding mode at the moment to decompress and try to figure out a solution. This means that when Tamamo finds him, he's sitting on the floor in the library with a book that he doesn't seem to be reading. There are black stains on his hands and his face that'll probably disappear in a few days, red flannel shirt loosely fitted over his frame and cat tail curved behind him.
He doesn't say anything either, if only because his eyes go directly to her tails to count them. Hello, wife.]
[To be fair to Tamamo, Dick told him. And so he nods slowly, scooting over a little as if to give her space to sit down. The book is one he's read before and was mostly meant to be a guise and distraction, so he doesn't mind.]
We can go somewhere more comfortable if you want. [The floor isn't great and apparently the ship is now full of snakes according to the mod announcement.]
But despite the fact that her sitting for any length of time is... painful, to put it simply, she's not going to complain as she stretches out on the floor.]
No, this will suffice.
[...]
Was your group successful in finding what we needed?
Yeah, I think so. We found the last ritual item we needed around the same time you guys needed. So we have all seven now. [His voice sounds hollow as he says it though.]
Yes. We did split up. A creature was lurking in the hallways, and -- well, I do not fear many things, but I doubt that any of us could have defeated it. We had to sneak around as quietly as possible, looking for clues in the cells, and eventually reached a room with a demon cut open on the table.
It was dying, but could still bare its teeth at us. Had it screamed during its death throes, it would have alerted the creature and we all would have died... so I decided I hadn't a need for all of my tails.
[A shrug]
But the damned thing was still loud enough to create some ruckus. I plucked out its heart and joined up with Kagachi-san in the hallway, but the creature spotted us and we ran for our lives.
... Truthfully, I don't know why I'm still alive, Master. The lights flickered off while that creature bore down on us, but then for some strange reason, it turned into stone and the lights were revived. We found Dick-san in the security room before we left together.
What did it look like? The monster. As long as we're sure it's dead I won't worry too much about it. Dick said it also turned into salt...I guess I'm curious what the demon looked like, too. If it was the same as the kind we've been seeing.
[At the mention of her tails though, a hand reaches down to gently pet one of the good, original ones. Somehow he can tell which ones belong to her and which are thanks to furry week. It's fine.]
In case you didn't know, I'm glad all three of you lived. And now that we have all of the items we need nobody has to do these break-ins anymore. We can for more information, but we have to start deciding if it's really worth the risk when we have the main components.
Hard to describe. Even staring at it, I did not get a good sense of its form. But it had more teeth and arms than any creature had a right to, all placed in unnerving positions.
[So vague but effective nightmare fuel. Ha. And his patting earns a lift of a smile from her, as one of her main tails brushes back against his hand. Yes, she knows he's glad they survived.]
You're right, though -- we'll have to make a decision soon. Information is invaluable, but so are our lives. Perhaps we can work out the details of the ritual without further need to explore.
[She says that, but Tamamo's mouth pulls into a thoughtful frown.]
I take it back, maybe it's a good thing you didn't get close enough to it. [Tailpat.]
...I want to think we're smart enough to work out the details, but I can't even think of how to begin. The book that Polly had is a good start, but I don't even know where it went. [He sees the frown though.] What're you thinking?
We don't know what you'll lose in place of that when they do disappear, you know. [But...he shifts to rest his head on her shoulder. He's 100% aware he's one of the only people who can get away with this.]
...there aren't many rooms left. In theory, it's possible to open them. Katy has a key, and so does Higekiri. We might be able to use them if we ask.
[-- That is a damn good point he brings up and Tamamo would shrug except now his head is on her shoulder. Under normal circumstances she'd be preening, but having eight tails means she's a bit more like her goddess form and therefore has gotta be a tsun about it.
... Still going to lean in and nuzzle the closest cat ear to her, though.]
Well... if I asked Higekiri-san, I do not think he would deny me access to the key, provided he could come along.
[...]
I will be honest, Master. I would prefer you not come with me, if I should go. Should I fail to protect you...
He wants to be of use, but in his current state of mind I don't know if that's such a good idea either. ...he was..kind of terrifying when we were still locked up and hadn't injected him.
[...but he nods anyway.] I get the feeling my luck's gonna run out eventually. I don't exactly like it, but I understand.
I understand your concerns, but Higekiri-san will recover. It is a painful thing, to feel the weight of a human's emotions... I went through such a state myself, many years ago.
[reaching over and gently petting his ears now]
But he prefers to spread happiness when he's able. It will not be an easy road, but I sincerely doubt he will regress back to that of a mindless sword, only to be used. He must make amends with his own will and the feelings that come with it.
... Though I admit I was almost brought to murder when he admitted he nearly harmed you. What luck that he didn't follow through with that, hm?
[Would tamamo have killed higekiri for touching junpei?
...is that really what it is? [He actually calms down with the ear petting so thanks Tamamo.] That thing bit him and he started to change. He couldn't even describe the pain because his reference was "melting." And that's when his emotions got all weird. I want to believe you're right but...it's sort of freaking me out.
[...but he glances at her carefully.] First of all, it's Wednesday. No murdering off schedule. [A joke, but.] ...that was my fault, I shouldn't have tried to touch him. But...thanks.
Hmph. [Her tails settle around both of them bc she's kinda possessive, smh]
He knows the consequences for attacking you, and that I don't much care about particulars.
[Sorry not sorry, she isn't here to play fair.]
... Though when I talked to him, about his response to that level of pain... he said it was the closest he'd ever felt to being a sword again, attacking whatever seemed to pose a threat.
He's not really a being used to that level of vulnerability, you see. We spirits can be rather weak in that regard.
[Still rhythmically petting his ears. It seems to have a calming effect on her as well, and her voice has returned to some of its usual softness]
Not that I blame you for your concerns... Ha. I don't doubt he would have attacked me, too, had I approached carelessly. He even said as much.
[He's fine with that. He's feeling pretty territorial lately himself, so he leans where he can and just frowns at the words. The ear pets help him bite back several comments that might boil down to arguments, but he takes a breath to focus on what he really wants to say.]
...I get why spirits feel the way they feel about being used, but I still hate it. I don't like being used, and I don't like the idea of using people like that. Is vulnerability dangerous for people who aren't used to it? [He's musing on that for a bit.] If we're meant to work together up until the end, we have to try to work around it without attacking each other. That's all I'm saying.
[A semi-peaceful solution. He's aware that it won't be that easy.]
[She notes that he's really just musing out loud, but tries to answer his question with her perspective all the same]
... Of course it depends on the spirit in question, but we can be haughty, as I'm sure you've realized. We've lived long and feel as if we've seen and experienced everything existence has to show.
[A sigh, and she leans her head against his] It's part of why I chose to be human. The complexity of human emotion was new and inviting. But I went into it with a goddess's perspective, and paid dearly for underestimating what I thought I craved.
[Gods and spirits are far, far more stupid than they want to admit, sometimes]
Regardless, I do not think you're wrong, and neither would Higekiri-san fault your thinking. He prefers the people around him be happy, and if his current state prohibits that, then he will try to change -- or I suppose, try to return back to the sword who does not attack thoughtlessly.
[A hand reaches up to pet her hair. He remembers that story. He remembers what Tamamo said to him, and how she feels about it, but he still doesn't exactly fault her for choosing to be human even if being human is one of the most painful experiences.]
I know. All of you seem to have that in common when you remind me how long you've lived and everything you've ever felt. [It's a little endearing even if it's a little frustrating, too.]
...some of the things Higekiri said to me today don't exactly inspire me with confidence. Do you really think he wants to return to the way he was? Or are we going to be too late to help?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
W5, WEDNESDAY
So naturally it's time to track down her Master wherever he is, expression pinched with concern.
She... probably ain't even gonna say anything, just immediately start glancing him over from head to toe for injuries]
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He doesn't say anything either, if only because his eyes go directly to her tails to count them. Hello, wife.]
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So while the bandages Dick administered are well hidden, but there is no changing the fact that Tamamo only has eight tails to her name currently.
There's a moment of quiet staring before:]
Might I join you, Master?
[somehow she doubts he's engrossed with that book]
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We can go somewhere more comfortable if you want. [The floor isn't great and apparently the ship is now full of snakes according to the mod announcement.]
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But despite the fact that her sitting for any length of time is... painful, to put it simply, she's not going to complain as she stretches out on the floor.]
No, this will suffice.
[...]
Was your group successful in finding what we needed?
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Still don't know what to do with it though.
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[She's aware that not knowing what to do with the items is plenty reason for frustration, but the hollowness bothers her regardless.]
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...Dick told me a little about what happened. Can I hear your side of things? He said that you split up.
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Yes. We did split up. A creature was lurking in the hallways, and -- well, I do not fear many things, but I doubt that any of us could have defeated it. We had to sneak around as quietly as possible, looking for clues in the cells, and eventually reached a room with a demon cut open on the table.
It was dying, but could still bare its teeth at us. Had it screamed during its death throes, it would have alerted the creature and we all would have died... so I decided I hadn't a need for all of my tails.
[A shrug]
But the damned thing was still loud enough to create some ruckus. I plucked out its heart and joined up with Kagachi-san in the hallway, but the creature spotted us and we ran for our lives.
... Truthfully, I don't know why I'm still alive, Master. The lights flickered off while that creature bore down on us, but then for some strange reason, it turned into stone and the lights were revived. We found Dick-san in the security room before we left together.
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[At the mention of her tails though, a hand reaches down to gently pet one of the good, original ones. Somehow he can tell which ones belong to her and which are thanks to furry week. It's fine.]
In case you didn't know, I'm glad all three of you lived. And now that we have all of the items we need nobody has to do these break-ins anymore. We can for more information, but we have to start deciding if it's really worth the risk when we have the main components.
[He has an opinion on that, but. Hm.]
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[Her eyebrows knit together.]
Hard to describe. Even staring at it, I did not get a good sense of its form. But it had more teeth and arms than any creature had a right to, all placed in unnerving positions.
[So vague but effective nightmare fuel. Ha. And his patting earns a lift of a smile from her, as one of her main tails brushes back against his hand. Yes, she knows he's glad they survived.]
You're right, though -- we'll have to make a decision soon. Information is invaluable, but so are our lives. Perhaps we can work out the details of the ritual without further need to explore.
[She says that, but Tamamo's mouth pulls into a thoughtful frown.]
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...I want to think we're smart enough to work out the details, but I can't even think of how to begin. The book that Polly had is a good start, but I don't even know where it went. [He sees the frown though.] What're you thinking?
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[The pragmatic side of her is imagining all the ways they might fuck this up if it turns out they really did have to go into those other locked rooms]
Well, I suppose if you want that information, simply command me into another room and I will go without fail.
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You do realize you just lost a tail. It can wait a day or two. [Or forever, fuck if they know.]
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[NOSE SCRUNCHING? How dare]
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We don't know what you'll lose in place of that when they do disappear, you know. [But...he shifts to rest his head on her shoulder. He's 100% aware he's one of the only people who can get away with this.]
...there aren't many rooms left. In theory, it's possible to open them. Katy has a key, and so does Higekiri. We might be able to use them if we ask.
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... Still going to lean in and nuzzle the closest cat ear to her, though.]
Well... if I asked Higekiri-san, I do not think he would deny me access to the key, provided he could come along.
[...]
I will be honest, Master. I would prefer you not come with me, if I should go. Should I fail to protect you...
[Tamamo will. not take it well.]
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He wants to be of use, but in his current state of mind I don't know if that's such a good idea either. ...he was..kind of terrifying when we were still locked up and hadn't injected him.
[...but he nods anyway.] I get the feeling my luck's gonna run out eventually. I don't exactly like it, but I understand.
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I understand your concerns, but Higekiri-san will recover. It is a painful thing, to feel the weight of a human's emotions... I went through such a state myself, many years ago.
[reaching over and gently petting his ears now]
But he prefers to spread happiness when he's able. It will not be an easy road, but I sincerely doubt he will regress back to that of a mindless sword, only to be used. He must make amends with his own will and the feelings that come with it.
... Though I admit I was almost brought to murder when he admitted he nearly harmed you. What luck that he didn't follow through with that, hm?
[Would tamamo have killed higekiri for touching junpei?
yea
yea she would've]
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[...but he glances at her carefully.] First of all, it's Wednesday. No murdering off schedule. [A joke, but.] ...that was my fault, I shouldn't have tried to touch him. But...thanks.
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He knows the consequences for attacking you, and that I don't much care about particulars.
[Sorry not sorry, she isn't here to play fair.]
... Though when I talked to him, about his response to that level of pain... he said it was the closest he'd ever felt to being a sword again, attacking whatever seemed to pose a threat.
He's not really a being used to that level of vulnerability, you see. We spirits can be rather weak in that regard.
[Still rhythmically petting his ears. It seems to have a calming effect on her as well, and her voice has returned to some of its usual softness]
Not that I blame you for your concerns... Ha. I don't doubt he would have attacked me, too, had I approached carelessly. He even said as much.
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...I get why spirits feel the way they feel about being used, but I still hate it. I don't like being used, and I don't like the idea of using people like that. Is vulnerability dangerous for people who aren't used to it? [He's musing on that for a bit.] If we're meant to work together up until the end, we have to try to work around it without attacking each other. That's all I'm saying.
[A semi-peaceful solution. He's aware that it won't be that easy.]
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... Of course it depends on the spirit in question, but we can be haughty, as I'm sure you've realized. We've lived long and feel as if we've seen and experienced everything existence has to show.
[A sigh, and she leans her head against his] It's part of why I chose to be human. The complexity of human emotion was new and inviting. But I went into it with a goddess's perspective, and paid dearly for underestimating what I thought I craved.
[Gods and spirits are far, far more stupid than they want to admit, sometimes]
Regardless, I do not think you're wrong, and neither would Higekiri-san fault your thinking. He prefers the people around him be happy, and if his current state prohibits that, then he will try to change -- or I suppose, try to return back to the sword who does not attack thoughtlessly.
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I know. All of you seem to have that in common when you remind me how long you've lived and everything you've ever felt. [It's a little endearing even if it's a little frustrating, too.]
...some of the things Higekiri said to me today don't exactly inspire me with confidence. Do you really think he wants to return to the way he was? Or are we going to be too late to help?
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[Indeed, there have been plenty of things she'd been wrong about, and sighs as she settles more against him]
... What did he say to you, Master?
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