NIKKARI;

[crashout]

Comments

[crashout]

Kagachi was teaching me to fight with a knife. I wasn't great at it, but it's a start. And I have a brass knuckle and two bullets left. I think everyone needs to know how to defend themselves but at the same time I think we're getting good at improvising in some cases.

[...but that's...nice to hear regardless.] I get the sword mentality that you're a weapon meant to protect and everything, but then who's protecting you? What can I really do?

[Again, not really being down on himself but just...asking.] I'd rather do everything I can to make sure you aren't the next person we lose.

[uncleanse]

. . .

This is the part where I would tell you not to worry about me, because at the end of the day, I am merely a sword, a tool. But that would only aggravate you further, wouldn't it?

[crashout]

Uh, yeah. [There's an almost annoyed but also sort of unhappy look in Nikkari's direction.] Like I said, I get it, but...you guys are more than that. Isn't that part of why you were given human forms and the ability to feel human things?

[uncleanse]

[ he doesn't answer, at least not verbally. the only thing he does is huddle closer to junpei, pressing his face into his shoulder and taking a deep breath. ]

[crashout]

[Hewwo. He lets this happen before nudging his head into Nikkari's.]

...it's what I think anyway.

[uncleanse]

[ again, he forgoes words in favor of lightly licking junpei's cheek. ]

[crashout]

[Catte...but he laughs briefly before bringing a hand up to pet his hair...and one of his ears because Junpei's come to find that actually feels nice so Nikkari might appreciate it.]

So I'll take that as your agreement for now. [A light joke.] Or another kind of gratitude?

[uncleanse]

[ he lets out a contented purr as junpei scratches his ear. cat solidarity... ]

It's more fun to let you wonder.

[ what other answer was he expecting, honestly, ]

[crashout]

[Slutting will come later when my boss isn't rambling about stuff, but anyway. Cat solidarity!! He's rubbing at Nikkari's ear and letting him cuddle up while staring at the space ahead of them.]

Are you ever going to tell me anything, or am I gonna be left wondering and making my own assumptions about you for the rest of my life? [Because, really, for someone like him who has multiple timelines of memories housed in his head, it's not even a question. He'll remember everything here on some level.]

[uncleanse]

[ that's fair

he's at least relieved, though, that they're able to drop the melancholy nature their conversation had been heading toward. ]

I tell you the things that matter.

[ rather than lick again, he instead gives junpei a little kiss on the cheek. ]

[crashout]

[There's a moment that he pauses, a little stunned by the action but there's a soft snort of amusement after that.]

Yeah...I can't argue with that. [He turns his head to face him.] I think I've been getting better at reading between the lines with you. Even if you make it difficult. [But it's fine because there's another pause before he leans his forehead against Nikkari's.] So thanks for that.

[uncleanse]

[ soft... in response, nikkari reaches out to wrap his arms around junpei to bring them closer together than they already were. ]

Haha... would I still be me without the air of intrigue, though? I thought you liked that about me.

[crashout]

[And because he's...himself, and also a little more clingy than usual, he continues to lean into him and curls up closer.]

I do because it's familiar. [Fondly. ] And frustrating. But I used to like mysteries as a kid. And puzzles. There was...always something cool about the idea that I was one of the few people to know the secrets of things and people that other people left alone. Things I could keep safe, I guess. [A nuzzle. ] Which sounds stupid now that I say it out loud.

[uncleanse]

[ on the one hand, that is SO fuckin lame? on the other... it gets to him, it really does. though his tail isn't exactly prehensile, he still has enough control of it to wrap it even more tightly around junpei's. ]

You know, perhaps that is why I am drawn to you as well. Someone who, despite my mannerisms and eccentricities, allows me to keep their company, who constantly wants to learn more about me and spend time with me, who is willing to protect a simple sword like me...

[ letting his hands slide up from junpei's shoulders to the back of his neck, he pulls back just enough to let junpei see his face. ]

I don't think that's stupid at all.

[crashout]

[It's very lame and he knows it, but Nikkari's accepting it and that helps.]

You're definitely one of the most eccentric people I've ever met in my life. But you're also one of the most interesting when it comes down to it. [The tone implies "why wouldn't I want to spend time with you and protect you" but he doesn't say it out loud.

Instead, Nikkari's hands are on the back of his neck and he looks at his face, breathing out quietly before he kind of bops into his face and kisses him lightly. Affection get.] Thanks for saying that though.

[uncleanse]

[ junpei doesn't say it out loud so nikkari doesn't either, but he understands the sentiment either way. it's why his face lights up and his ears twitch, and why he ultimately leans back in to kiss junpei again. it isn't a heated gesture, though. no, he just... kind of wants to focus on the kiss for what it is, without any expectation of leading to something more.

hm. ]

[crashout]

[Nikkari will now get to know the lore that Junpei straight-up just really likes kissing. That is to say, Nikkari leans in for a kiss and Junpei allows it, a pleased hum working its way past his lips and over Nikkari's. It's slow and gentle, weirdly, and his tail moves against Nikkari's in a light little brush while his mouth remains pliant.

Sometimes you just like kissing people you care about, it's fine.]

[uncleanse]

[ real talk, he's going to be so sad when they lose the animal parts at the end of the week... there's something really nice about still being able to touch with a tail when his hands are occupied.

against all odds, nikkari continues to keep the kiss chaste, tongue staying put in his own mouth instead of trying to find the quickest possible way into junpei's. when he finally does move, it's to pull away a little, but certainly not much; his lips still brush against junpei's as he murmurs, ]

You're welcome, by the way.

[crashout]

[Spoilers we're in endgame and we're just stuck as furries. Anyway he's 100% down with the chaste kiss, relaxed and comfortable even when Nikkari pulls away. Please don't mind him trying to follow with his mouth for a moment.]

Guess you really do just tell me the things that matter.

[uncleanse]

[ oh, he definitely doesn't mind. but even as calm as he's being right now, he's still nikkari, and that means he's still going to tease by moving back just a little to make junpei chase him more. ]

Haha... did you doubt me?

[crashout]

[He definitely tries to chase him? Come back what the fuck. But there's a look that's a little uncertain and a little melancholy when he replies.]

The last ghost I chased, I followed for a year. And when I finally caught it, I still didn't get the answers I wanted the most when I asked. [A shrug. ] ...I think I'm always going to doubt things for a while for the rest of my life...at least until those things are proven true.

[uncleanse]

[ hm. that... isn't the response he was expecting. it gets him to still, at least, as he keeps a neutral expression on his face. he merely takes in junpei's for a moment before quietly saying, ]

You know, ghosts aren't used to being the ones who are chased. Perhaps that's why you didn't get what you were searching for. But I am a sword, Junpei, not a ghost. Does that change anything?

[ there's a second's hesitation before he reaches for junpei's hand. ]

We exist, therefore we know we exist.

[crashout]

[Part of him wants to say he got it eventually. Part of him wants to dissect everything he's saying and explain to Nikkari what he really means. But there's the selfish part of him that knows Akane's secrets are hers, just like Nikkari's are his. It's why he takes that hand and the grip is a little tight like he's grounding himself, or as a way to say he's listening.

The echo of his own words parroted back at him renders a small smile though. ]

Of course you'd throw that back at me. [He doesn't mind.] There are some versions of me who got what I wanted. And there are others who didn't. And I'm still not really sure which version of myself I am these days but I want this to be the version where I don't let things I want slip out of my hands again.

[He doesn't even necessarily mean it romantically, but the intent is there. His feelings for Nikkari are complicated to phrase but at least it's clear that they run pretty deep in some form or another. So that's something.]

[uncleanse]

[ there's a lot to take in there, most of which nikkari doesn't understand a goddamn word of. so instead of try to parse whatever junpei's talking about multiple versions of himself or what he even truly meant about the ghost comment earlier, he focuses on the one part he doesn't need any sort of further clarification on. ]

... As I said, I am a sword. As long as your grip is true—[ he squeezes junpei's hand back, ]—then Nikkari Aoe will be by your side.

[crashout]

[...he sort of laughs and ducks his head.] Have I ever been anything but true with you?